Common mistakes Dutchies make in the use of English

"Dutch Tongue" by michael.gr, based on the logo of The Rolling Stones.

"I will learn you how to skate." ("Learn" instead of "Teach".)

"When you want, we also have it in white." ("When" instead of "If".)

"Let's meet at sex." ("Sex" instead of "Six".)

"Dear colleagues, hereby the schedule." ("Hereby" instead of "Here is" or "Hereby I give you".)

"We have lot's of bicycle's" (Genitive instead of plural suffix.)

"Meet you at the busstop" (Concatenating words that are not concatenated in English.)

"Let's have a telco" ("Telco", which means "telecommunications company", instead of "Teleconference".)

Object-adjective instead of adjective-object. ("Emergency exit train driver" instead of "Train driver emergency exit".)

A sign that you can find inside virtually every single train in the entire Kingdom of The Netherlands. The English translation is urging us to not block the driver of the emergency exit train.

"I am a cineville" ("cineville" instead of "cinephille") -- there is even a .nl domain misspelled this way.

Also: Dutch pronunciation rules cause some really weird phenomena, for example when you call Vodafone, the recorded greeting informs you that you have reached "Fodavone".


A Programming Language

"Coding Software Running On A Computer Monitor" by Scopio from NounProject.com


My thoughts and notes on how I would like a new programming language to look like.

The goals of the language are:

  • Simple and elegant. (So that it is suitable for the academia.)
  • Expressive. (So that it is suitable for experienced programmers.)
  • Consistent. (So that it is attractive to developer teams.)
  • Guiding. (So that it promotes best practices.) 
  • Fast. (So that it is suitable for high performance computing.)
  • Lean. (So that it is suitable for resource-constrained computing.)
This is work-in-progress; It is bound to be heavily amended as time passes, especially if I try some new language, like Kotlin or Rust.

Summary of language characteristics